Feeling more pissed off than you can imagine, fucked over (for the umpteenth time)
Listening to "reise in die unendlichkeit" ~ mechanical horizon
Currently addicted to AHHH FUCKING KICKING SOMEONE'S ASS DAMMIT!!!
Currently irritated by SCHOOLSCHOOLSCHOOLPEOPLESCHOOOOOOLFUCKINGSCHOOOOOL
Randomness: AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!


DAMMIT!!!

I cannot count how many times I get in trouble for something I DID NOT DO. I'm sick of it!!! I HATE SCHOOL!!! HIGH SCHOOL CAN BURN IN HELL FOR ALL ETERNITY!!! IT IS A BREEDING GROUND FOR PURE, UNADULTERATED ANGER.

I'm sick of it, I'm sick of it, I'm so fucking sick of it!!!!!

I'm not going to stop going, because I'm inches away from graduating, and once I get that over with, I'm never ever going back again. So unfortunately, no dropping out. The consequences of staying in school are better than leaving, especially after coming so far (bullshit and all).

Lian and I are teacher aides for fifth period. The teacher told us there was some sort of special thing for WEE (this work experience whatever that we're supposed to go to every Tuesday; I never go because it's always crowded and the work teacher NEVER explains what's going on because she always starts without us) we had to go to in a room across the school. We said, "Okay, we'll be back later then," and went. So we went (there were cops everywhere and they were apparently looking for a certain someone who did something bad), but it was crowded, and this guest speaker was there, and we felt it'd be rude to interrupt. So we went to walk back to our class so we could do our little TA duty and help the teacher like we're supposed to. [growls at everything]

And we near the office and this counselor and her boss (aka the principal) are there, and we didn't have a pass, because THEY NEVER CHECK IT ANYWAY. But this counselor wants to look good 'cause her boss is right there, and the cops are swarming the school looking for their homeboy-delinquent or whatever, so she says, "You two, come with me." So we do, even though we were going back to class, minding our own business, doing absolutely nothing wrong, unlike the other kids they picked up (who were wandering aimlessly).

She asks us what happened and we tell her everything that happened. She calls the work teacher and that bitch is all, "No, they didn't check in." And Lian and I are all, "Umm, helloooooo? We went but left. We never 'check in' for that class. We always just go in and sit down."

And so the counselor was like, "You guys have detention because you lied." And that just made me sooooo mad, you can't even believe. Someone accusing me of lying when THEY'RE the one lying (BECAUSE I'M ACTUALLY TELLING THE TRUTH HERE!!!!) is...AGH. So she calls our parents and goes, "Blah blah, your daughter/sister (my brother picked up) has to stay after school because she was dishonest."

WTF. I would've felt like I was staying after for a somewhat REAL reason if she'd said "They were walking around school without a pass" or something. But "Being dishonest"? WHAT THE FUUUUUCK?!!?!?!?! For one, we WERE NOT DISHONEST. Two, last time I checked, IT IS NOT A CRIME TO BE DISHONEST (unless you were being charged with murder or something, not some useless-ass shiitake like this).

So we went to the fucking work class and then when we got back to our regular TA class (where we were headed when we got figuratively screwed in the ass), we told Mrs. Zupkas and she was like, "That's not right! I think it was because all the cops were looking for someone--who they didn't find, by the way--so you guys just happened to be out there at the wrong time." IN YOUR FACE EVIL PRINCIPAL AND COUNSELOR (WITH STICKS UP YOUR ASSES), even she knows!!! And she usually sides with teachers!!! That's saying something, man.

Mr. Gough said it was totally wrong too. He said I should have my dad call and yell at the school (which I will if the so-called events of this day ever come up again and I have to go to the office or whatever) because it's complete bullshit. I said my mom or dad would be pissed--but not at me. And that was satisfying to remember. (By the way, I told my mom what happened and she did get pissed, bwahaha.)

So Lian and I go to stay for detention after school. The detention teacher never comes. So another counselor lady (who is nice; thank you, Mrs. Bengston, for not being A COMPLETE ASSHOLE LIKE THE REST OF YOUR CO-WORKERS) just had us write out our names and said, "Go ahead and go. You guys came." So we left. I saw the detention teacher coming and he was asking everyone, "Are you in detention?" but Lian said "No" while I just stayed silent and walked away in a sort of angry daze. My better half told me to say, "Yes, I am." But my common sense side said, "No. You're not. You're angry. You're not supposed to be in detention. You didn't do anything worth receiving it." So I was silent. Besides, Mrs. Bengston told us we came and we were free to go. So, we technically didn't do anything wrong. AS USUAL.

This always happens, you know. I'll be sitting at a table and everyone BUT me is talking and I'll even tell them to be quiet. Then the teacher makes the entire table stay after class.

"But I wasn't talking," I always say. Because I never was. But I still have to stay anyway. I'm tired of taking the shit for other people for something I never did. It's horrible, it's unfair. And don't give me that whole "well, life isn't fair" bullcrap, because you know what? Life ISN'T fair. But it sure is a whole lot more fair than that, and can be fair when it needs to be.

I'm so tired of being the scapegoat. It's not right.

When I first came to high school, I thought, Hey, maybe it'll be fun. At the end of it now, I don't want to be there. I hate it more than anything else. I never want to go. My mom always wonders why I don't want to go. Because it's a miserable place. It makes me furious. It gets me stressed. It makes me say things I don't like to say. I can't think of anything that makes me angrier than school does.

I also used to wonder how kids could shoot up their schools. I was like, "That's terrible! There's no excuse for that!" But now, at the end of it all, I actually understand why. I don't blame them anymore. They wonder why postal workers go crazy too. It's the same shit. No respect. Getting treated like dirt.

Teachers abuse their authority. I was always taught to listen to them because they were the elders or whatever. I don't respect them anymore. They think that since they're the big people on campus, they can order you around and treat you like shit just to make their injured egos get a little better.

They need to start realizing the respect goes both ways.

Give me no respect and you shall receive none in return.

Feeling sleeeepy.
Listening to "Clair de Lune" ~ Debussy
Currently addicted to classical, Kurow Kirishima, writing, staying up late
Currently irritated by staying up late, school
Randomness: KEYSEHHHH SOZEEEEEEEEEHHHHHH!!!


Ahem...obviously changed my blog to some generic Blogger layout because...well, it looks prettier and is easier on the eyes, and I also had some strange obsession with this template. XD

I made another blog, too.... Dunno if the format it's in will work, but I sure hope what I have in mind will. And well, I shouldn't call it a blog, even if it is posted on Blogspot with the little bloggy form.

It's actually a really boring, gay fanfic I'm doing about Kurow Kirishima from le fighting game Project Justice (don't vomit just yet; wait until this next part XD)and his sister Yurika. I made her his half-sister though. I think it's more focused on Yurika though... [unsure]

I've got two chapters up so far. I dunno if I want to/am able to tell you what it's about because I actually don't know what it's about. It's really more of a writing exercise...just to boost my creativity and whatnot. If I finish this one and have more little stories like it, I'll probably post them on similar blogs.

Oh, before you figure, "Yeah, I might want to read that..."

If you're all "ew, omg, that's just wrong!" then think twice before doing so. XD; I dunno WHO made Yurika and Kurow brother and sister, 'cause I don't care what anyone says, those two were sooooo made for each other. o_O They're opposites, but in a puzzle-piece kinda way. AHH!!! CURSES TO THE LAST PICTURE OF THE DARKSIDE ENDING!!! LOOK WHAT KIND OF TWISTED STORIES YOU HAVE CAUSED ME TO CREATE!!!

Anyway. XD

It probably won't be that bad, really. I hope, anyway. :P

Don't even ask why I had the nerve to put in an annoyingly hot (yes, he might be 30-ish but he shall be Olivier-Martinez-esque) French dude. No one knows what he's doing in Japan. Even I don't, and I made him up. XD

Unfortunately, some parts might not make sense if you haven't played the game...if you do read it and encounter any problems, just ask me about it. :)

If you're still interested, homies:
Dark Melody

I haven't got much there yet, but I'll be working on it. I didn't really spell check/proofread either, so if you can see any mistakes, please inform me. n_n

Feeling like shit!! my post just totally got lost. FUCKING STUPID!!! AAAAH!! [throws something]
Listening to shorty's song from bust a groove 2 (no, I don't remember what it's called and I'm too lazy to go check; and yes, the stage on the raft or whatever); my mom screaming "PACQUIAO YOU CAN KNOCK HIM OUT!!!!"
Currently addicted to baten kaitos, my obsession with being a man (I'll explain)
Currently irritated by taking on too many things at once!! why do I torture myself like this?!
Randomness: here. (thanks to axel for that; now that I think of it, I'm getting a vague feeling that I have seen that before...the music was just too damn familiar. XD)


OMGHOLYSHIITAKEBATMAN!!! IT'S A BLOG POST!!!

Yeah, haven't blogged in a while...AND now I have to redo this piece of shit post when I got halfway through it. Luckily I remember almost word-for-word what I wrote...I guess that can be regarded as a talent.

Oh yeah, about the changing into a man thing during my period. And guys who might be reading this and go "ew, ew, ew she said 'period'", go get some balls and grow up, you immature losers. Anyway, it'd be nice to change just for those days out of the month. Not having to deal with it would be great. It's icky and horrible and does absolutely nothing helpful, in my opinion. But yeah, lately I've been getting the horrid "WHY GOD WHYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!" feeling that if I would've been uber-hot if I'd been born male. I would've worn makeup and nice clothes and cute pants and had niiiiiiiice hair. I would've went gay bishounen on myself. [is sad] XD

WOW I've been getting into my stories a lot more lately...I've got to finish writing out character profiles (which will take FOREVER) and post them here too. I've gotten most of the chars from my current main story (The Glass Rose) all written out, but I've got to move on to the characters from my other main stories (the Tom story, which might be called either Anathema Kiss if it's a graphic novel or Save Me From Heaven, which I like better and also makes more sense; Ekaryon R--what a stupid name; the Manipulata series, which was the name of another story, but I made it Sorin's....)

So yeah, I think that's about it.


Current favorite characters of mine:

1. Eiryun Revelle (The Glass Rose): He's just so FREAKING AWESOME jeeeeez.
2. Lucifiel (Save me from Heaven): Mein Gott, he is hott. XD
3. Thomas Andersen/Azra'èl, Aisden Silver/Uriel (Save me from Heaven): I must draw him again...I guess his peak was in freshman year!!! NOT GOOD!!! [tries her hardest to get back into a tom mood] AND YURI IS IN THIS TOO BECAUSE THEY'RE TWINS DAMMIT!!!! (and shh, I really do like freakish Yuri better...but don't tell my dear thomas that ;_;)
4. Üdon Zephiel/Tajiri Arashi/Tofu (Ekaryon R): He's just too adorable. And he changes into a cat, c'mon.

Current favorite characters that aren't mine:

1. Lyra Belacqua/Lyra Silvertongue (Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials): I usually don't like kids being main characters in books, but Lyra kicks ass!!! And she's not really THAT little...she does grow up at the end. YAY. And go Pantalaimon!!! [dances her "i love the dæmon pantalaimon" dance]
2. Kalas (Baten Kaitos): He's such a vile little bastard for a main character. And he looks like an ugly version of Marth. How I love thee, o asshole Kalas....
3. Gerald Tarrant (C.S. Friedman's Coldfire trilogy): Come on, do you think I'd ever NOT like Tarrant?!
4. Iorek Byrnison (His Dark Materials): HE'S A BEAR. WITH ARMOR. GO READ THE BOOKS; YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. (I'm so sad I never read them sooner!!! It's all your fault, Tarrant!!! You too, Sabriel!!!)

And here's an extra little something because I LOVE STEVE NAGHAVI from AND ONE:

LOL. XD