current obsession» nothing
feeling» like crying some more and throwing up my insides
listening to» "all of this" ~ blink 182, robert smith
currently irritated by» everything
currently addicted to» absolutely nothing
randomness» nothing is random about fate


I don't even know why I'm even like this right now. The first thing I did when I woke up was cry my sorry little eyes out. I'm tired of everything... and I'm so lonely. I just don't know why I'm getting this way again. I have this sick feeling in my stomach... like something's not quite right, and I just keep crying.

I can't even eat. I don't want anything. I don't want to do anything except go somewhere and breathe in some fresh air. I never go anywhere. I never do anything. I want to just go somewhere and sit by my lonesome little self and be stupid and just cry, cry, cry until I get this sick feeling to go away.

Too many bad dreams, all about the same thing, all repeating, all making me cry. Too many of these feelings. I know something's wrong. And if nothing's wrong, then something is going to go wrong; I just know it.

current obsession» food... mwahahaha
feeling» kinda prettyfull but more silly than anything else n_n
listening to» "rainbow" ~ spektralized
currently irritated by» ugly plants
currently addicted to» the notion of getting a nose job
randomness» "ist alles okay...?"


I look quite Middle Eastern today. But it's all right because my hair is decent and my eyes are unusually bright. Woo! I feel pretty. n_n

I don't really know what to say... I'm kind of just really bored. I'm begging my mum to let me get my nose fixed. I want a pointier, longer nose because mine is really ugly and makes the rest of my face look even uglier than it is.

And I look Middle Eastern!!!

Oh well, I'm not moving to Iran, not after watching that movie in Mr. A's class. [laughs] Hilarious movie. Teaches women never to get married to Iranian men. XD

Anyway. I'm out of here. Have fun with yourselves (don't be vulgar).

current obsession» too worried to obsess
feeling» WORRIED... and crampy and blaaaaah. [shakes fist at being a chick]
listening to» "reich aus glas" ~ melotron
currently irritated by» ignorant people, cramps [shakes fist]
currently addicted to» mechanical horizon, melotron (still!), flossing more than usual
randomness» Farrin and I be worried... XD

xylael: [cries]
M0ti0ncItySndtrk: [sighs]
xylael: [whines]
M0ti0ncItySndtrk: [whimpers]
xylael: [sniffles] Hold meeeeee.... XD

El chupacabra... hehehe....

OKAY! ENOUGH!

I can't even smile or open my mouth to talk because someone will inevitably say something on the lines of, "Wow, you have white teeth...."
[screams]
They are not! Not not not! You people just... just... don't know how to brush your teeth! [hides mouth with a fan] GRRRR!!!!

*huffhuff* Okay. I think I'm all done with that. It just gets really irritating after a while. Sure, it might be a compliment or whatever, but I swear, my teeth are not glow-in-the-dark white or anything. They're crooked and ugly and grrraaaaaa.... [stops]

ANYYYYWAAAAAAYYYY.....

I want to be a dude right now very badly... my tummy is hurting and I'm taking it like a sissy boy. *whimperwhinecry*

Okay, I done blog. I go now.
[stares at her doggie above]
Nuuu... ugly chupacabra chihuahua.

current obsession» james duval (nyahaahaha)
feeling» pissy-pissy and tummy-achey
listening to» "gottes vergessenes kind" ~ mechanical horizon
currently irritated by» myself
currently addicted to» melotron, mechanical horizon
randomness» "spell F-U-N... spell fun...."


Ah, this freaking song is sooo good right now. The guy's kind of mumbling, but whatever. Hmm... I've got a tummyache. [cries] When will I ever be 100%?

I need to work on French homework soon, but I'm too lazy to go the three steps to my bed and take it out. I want to wear a paper bag over my head too. I'm mad at my reflection. It's ugly.

I want to stop being pissy too. I'm getting mad at everything and that makes me mad that I'm getting so mad at everything that shouldn't be making me mad. hehehe...

Hmm... I'm bored. So bored I'm making another whack-ass quiz. [laughs] I'm a pathetic dork. I even took freaking surveys, I was that bored. I want to go to sleep but I'm not tired enough to. Bleh, I feel really shitty.

Reading The Catcher in the Rye is so freaking boring. Don't read that book. It sucks major arse. People said it was good, but... nah. The only good/funny/whatever part was near the end when that drunken teacher dude started petting Holden. Nyaahahahahaha....

Moo, I've been drawing a bunch of these really cutesy chibi-ish stuff lately and I hate it. Even if they are just doodles, it makes me sick. That's not what I do. Well I guess they're decent, but still! That's not the point! I just... would rather draw in my usual style. XD


"hey 'murrey'... that kid ain't mine!"

current obsession» darth vader... not.
feeling» like a moron (yay!)
listening to» "fashion fight pause" ~ hot hot heat
currently irritated by» this guy's voice
currently addicted to» this song, even if the guy's voice is annoying
randomness» "uh oh uh oh uh oh uh oh" <--- that's how the song goes


As if I didn't already know this? XD

You Should Date An Italian! You love for old fashioned romance, with an old fashioned guy An Italian guy is the perfect candidate to be your prince charming If your head doesn't spin enough, just down another espresso with him Invest in a motorcycle helmet - and some carb blocker for all that pasta! Which Foreign Guy Should You Date? Take This Quiz :-)

Hopefully I don't have to date that guy in the picture. He looks kind of slow and his haircut is atrocious.... Looks like a nice dresser though. :P
Stuff happened but I'm too lazy to go over it. Have a nice day.

current obsession» gackt
feeling» kinda naughty... eeep.
listening to» "days of the phoenix" ~ afi
currently irritated by» pretty people (well, some of them)
currently addicted to» pretty people XD
randomness» bear in grass! woo!



Gackt. Looking pretty as usual. (I just wanted to test the new image thing they've got going here... apparently it works. Woo!)

Not much happened today. Kel and I (mostly Kel) somehow came up with this "Bear in grass" concept and so I'll be drawing a pic for it; she already wrote the accompanying poem. :P

My brother was showing us a tape of Raw and sure enough, there he was up front jumping around like a moron in his bright red shirt... heheh being on TV more than once in a lifetime thanks to wrestling must be so fun. n_n He always manages to get on TV during shows....

I drew pictures of Sailorvenus and Sailormars today; I'll probably draw the others soon... maybe only the main five though. Tuxedo Mask is a no-no because I absolutely hated... er, hate... that guy, and the same goes for Chibi-moon. But Venus and Mars turned out looking all right, so I'm happy. I think Sailormoon fanart must be one of the most fun things to colour. Don't ask why; it just sounds real interesting to me. Maybe it's their different colours, I don't know.

Which reminds me... I've still got that Ryoga fanart piece to work on. And those two pretty Navi pics I never got around to colouring. [dies] I hate this. I rush myself like this is some stupid job, and in a way, it is.

I'm getting a tan. Kcuf! I want to be pale... not... icky and dark.
Damn my genes to Iowa. I seem to not have anything I admire. My hair sucks, my eyes suck, my body sucks, and now my skin even sucks.

Also, I feel a sudden urge to learn fencing. It's really homo, I know, but I think it'd be really fun... sounds like a good hobby (yay! stabbing people! XD). Now I'm thinking of dolls. My friend Marvie and I were discussing how much we loved paper dolls, and now I'm considering making them. I also want to look for some real (as in three-dimensional) dolls to mess around with. I loooooove dolls so much it's unbelievable. I'm the last person people expect to like dolls, but I do.

[laughs] The one time I say "not much happened today" I write my whole freaking life story. :P Sorry this was so long and useless... I tend to do that sort of thing.